Fried food diet

UPDATE: I was so sad to hear about the tragedy that happened at the fair. My prayers are with the families of the victims.

I was in Indianapolis two weeks ago working at Crackers Comedy Club and it was the opening weekend of the Indiana State Fair. I’d never been to a state fair before. All I can say is: WOW. I was expecting to see some giant fruit and vegetable contests and folks showing off their livestock (I watch a lot of TV), and while there were tractor exhibitions and music tents, and one miserable elephant forced to walk around in circles and give rides to fair-goers, what I saw most was food. And most of it fried. I don’t think there’s anything they won’t fry at a state fair…

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And on the next episode of “Stuff like this only happens to EJ…”

This weekend I’m working at Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club in San Antonio, TX. The first show was last nite, and when I walked into the lobby of the club I could see that there was a silent auction going on.

I introduced myself to Ruben, who was working in the ticket booth, and asked about the event. He said the show was a benefit for a local animal shelter called Animal Friends. Cool. He then went on to explain that in between acts the staff of the shelter would be bringing dogs on stage, telling their stories and asking people in the audience to adopt them. Cool… Wait. Dogs are gonna be here? In the showroom?

So… yeah, in addition to that being a bit awkward I’m also severely allergic to dogs. Like Will Smith in “Hitch” allergic. Having the dogs in the showroom, having the host hold them and then sharing a mic with him… All very bad things. I can’t blame management because this kind of thing happens once-in-a-never. It’s not like “Hey, you’re not allergic to dogs, are you?” is a standard question when booking acts. And when I told the manager he felt awful and immediately did all he could to make sure I was comfortable and that if I wasn’t we had a backup plan. They swapped out the mic for me and I hung out in the back office for most of the show. I didn’t shake hands with anyone after the show, but I made sure to address it while I was on stage so people didn’t think I was being anti-social. I started to get a teeny bit itchy near the end of the nite, but I bolted and was able to avoid any real issues.

The worst part of being allergic to dogs is that I really like them. And sometimes I’ve stayed around a dog when I know I should leave just because I heart it. But it usually takes me about two days to recover and I didn’t have that kind of time since I’m here working. I’m even more allergic to cats and probably wouldn’t have been able to continue working the weekend if there were cats anywhere around.

Wonder if they would have paid me…

Anyway, it was a cool event with some adorable dogs and the people seemed to be really nice and really care about the dogs. It’s a no-kill shelter and some of the dogs there last nite had been at the shelter as long as three years. Hope they raised tons of money and that all of those dogs find homes.

Water Slides > Tarmac Slides

I stole borrowed this photo from the Facebook page of another passenger who was on my flight. Wish I had ‘borrowed’ it before I finished editing my video! How crazy is this: There were two other female comics I know headed to the same TV taping I was going to that were also on the plane, and none of us saw each other.

P.S. I know the slides look cool, but it wasn’t quite as much fun as it is when there’s a pool at the bottom.

Photo Credit: Gina Brillon/Eddie Merino

Me In Your City: Atlanta/Los Angeles

On Monday nite the flight I was on from Atlanta to Los Angeles caught on fire mid-flight. It was really scary. But we evacuated via the inflatable slides, which was kinda exciting too — though I’m not sure I should admit that… Anyway, I created a Me In Your City video blog about. Wanna watch it? Here it go:

Around the world in 80 minutes

Last weekend I drove out to Toledo, OH to work at The Funny Bone Comedy Club. I was working with my buddy Billy D. Washington and we had a super fun weekend! Our friend Vince Morris came down from Dayton to surprise us and emcee the Thursday and Sunday shows. YAY!!! I’d heard great things about the Toledo Zoo and hadn’t been to a zoo in years, so I decided to try it. I mentioned it from the stage on Friday and it turned out the club GM had some complimentary zoo tickets in her office. So on Saturday morning, I got up and headed over there! Let me just say that it sounded like a much better idea before I realized it was going to be 101 degrees…

The first attraction I saw was the seal/polar bear exhibit. Gosh those seals were huge! I took video of them flipping over and swimming on their backs. So cool.

There were tons of little kids in the polar bear section, running up to the windows and pounding to get the polar bear’s attention.

“Oh look, he’s so cute!”

“He’s so fluffy!”

“I wanna pet him!”

In my best Clay Davis voice: Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. If you got anywhere near it, a polar bear would K-I-L-L you. Dead. I don’t think anything that could rip me limb from limb is cute. Somebody needs to tell these kids those bears ain’t the ones in the Coke commercials.

After I left the cool polar bear exhibit I headed to Africa, where I went on a mini-safari and saw zebras and giraffes and ostriches.

Then I rode a lion.

I went to see the tigers and there was even a baby elephant born at the zoo that day. But it was way too hot to trek over there and see it. I had a great time at you, Toledo Zoo. But it was time for a Mickey D’s strawberry lemonade and some air conditioning.

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen…