You don’t want it with Philly


Do you think you did that last season, dude? Because 7-7, 19 TDs, 14 INTs and 10 fumbles. So, no. Nope. GTFOH.

Sometimes I get booked to work a weekend somewhere, and when I get there I find out I’ll be opening for a comic I don’t believe is as strong as I am. But they’ve got a lot of heat or have a better resume than I do… I don’t complain to club management or the booker (that’s what friends are for); my job at that point is just to be as funny as I can and show the club that I deserve to come back to close the next year.

If someone could please explain this concept to Sam Bradford, I’d be super appreciative. No need for this tantrum, bruh. It’s not like you balled out last year or were a longtime member of the squad who deserved better. You just got to Philly! And you only have a 2-year contract. You knew the Eagles weren’t committed to you long term, anyway.

In a recent column, Peter King writes:

What I would say to Bradford:
1. You have earned the right to be ticked off that the Eagles are going to draft a quarterback intended to beat you out.
2. You have not earned the right to go on strike over it.
3. You have been paid massively and so far have not produced to justify what the Rams and Eagles have paid you.
4. You control your fate. Be the best quarterback in camp, and you’ll play. Compete.

Yes, yes, yes to all of the above. Do what you claimed you were willing to do last year, Sam: “Prove to everyone that [you] belong here.” Real ballers ball. Plus, you don’t want it with Philly.

Also, effffffffffffffffffffffffffff Chip Kelly.

A girl’s gotta have standards…

While I was in Indianapolis, site of next weekend’s Super Bowl XLVI, I talked a lot on stage about football. Everyone reading knows how much I love the game and how hard I ride for my Eagles. I hope you’ll enjoy the clip, and if you’re a sports fan (male or female) and you’ve ever been involved in an intra-divisional romance — or worse — with a person who’s not a sports fan at all, I hope you’ll also identify. ;)

Quit breakin’ my heart

I am a die-hard Philadelphia Eagles fan.

Anyone who even halfway knows me, knows that. Many of y’all probably remember a few years back when I used to blog about every Philadelphia Eagles game. I called it the Happy Eagles/Sad Eagles Chronicles and I’d post a different photo along with the blog based upon whether we won or lost. I even had a regular late night call-in segment on WIP 610 in Philly…

But I had to stop doing that. Because I was so emotionally involved in their performance that a loss had the potential to ruin the next 3 or 4 days of my life. I bring all this up because I was scrolling thru some old posts and I found one from November 16, 2008 (the game where we tied the Bengals and McNabb didn’t know the overtime rules) where I wrote:

My mama always told me that if I didn’t have anything nice to say then I should say it loudly and enunciate. So here goes: I DON’T KNOW IF I’VE EVER BEEN THIS DISAPPOINTED IN AN EAGLES SEASON. And no, I’m not exaggerating. When we lost in the Superbowl, of course I was upset about that. But I didn’t feel that way all season. And during the seasons when McNabb was hurt, we knew early that it was gonna be a struggle to compete. I had no expectations. Anything good that happened was a pleasant surprise (i.e. Jeff Garcia). But this year with a healthy McNabb, the addition of Asante Samuel, the promise of DeSean Jackson… we had a 3-win streak a few weeks back and I was sooo excited about this team. But the manner in which we’ve lost the games we’ve lost this year has been hard to swallow. No shut-outs, no poundings… AND no 3rd down conversions… Just not doing the little things we need to do to get it done.

The radio show I was on Friday had a caller who was saying that Andy Reid should go because at some point, a team that’s not winning just stops hearing the coach. Perhaps that’s true. But I don’t think Andy Reid’s suspect play calling had anything to do with Donovan’s three interceptions and all those dropped passes. What we’re witnessing is a team losing faith in itself — not just their coach.

And it reminded me that at some point in every season I’ve felt exactly like I do now. But this year it feels a billion times worse because of all the big-name acquisitions we made and all the “Dream Team” hype (which I have ALWAYS believed is the kiss of death). This season it’s not just our losses that are blowing me — it’s how narrowly we’ve won the two games we won. After last week’s game Andy Reid’s usually brief presser was even briefer than normal. “We need to get better” is all he said. And at 1-4, it’s all he needed to say. Yes, we won this week, but you HAVE to get better, Iggles. ‘Cause my nerves can’t take this anymore. This is gonna be my final post about them for the season, but pray for me y’all.

Steeler Fever

I cannot get this song out of my head! I spent the last few days doing shows in and around Pittsburgh, and as it’s Superbowl weekend, this song was on every radio station ALL the time. The student’s were playing it over the PA at my college shows… Maaaaan.

Even the construction/traffic signs on the Pennsylvania Turnpike were rooting for the Steelers. Pretty sure this sign could have been better used to advise me of the quick merge that was just beyond it. But who gives a hoot about traffic safety when the Steelers are playing for lucky No. 7?

Last nite I was performing at Seton Hill University, and they dressed up the statue of the saint their school is named for — Elizabeth Ann Seton — in Steeler swag. They even moved the time of mass to coincide with the game! These Steeler fans are no joke. And I really hope Pittsburgh wins. Mainly because I stood outside and froze my behind off while Green Bay ended our season and I hate them for that. And if they do win, I hope some of that championship mojo rubs off on the team on the other side of the state.

Exhale… Happy Superbowl Sunday everyone!