2009 June | Erin Jackson | Stand-Up Comedian

Stop biting monkeys and stuff

The other day my girlfriend Nikki was telling me how she had recently confused the expressions “monkey on your back” and “hair of the dog that bit you” into like “bite the monkey that bit you on your back” … or something equally as hilarious ;)

Which got me to thinking about the song “Monkey” by George Michael:

George Michael – Monkey
by zocomoro

I LOVED George and Wham as a kid. And my 9-year-old brain thought this was a song about a man whose girlfriend had a pet monkey that he was jealous of. I remember thinking if she loves him why would she choose to play with her monkey and make her boyfriend sad?

I wish I were kidding.

One of my uncles explained the song to me… and that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the 4th grade EJ learned all about the perils of substance abuse.

Hahaha… Of course I now realize that George Michael having a girlfriend was equally as funny as a woman who preferred a monkey to a man.

David Letterman’s ‘apology’ and my first real hate mail

I was quoted in this article in the Style section of Saturday’s Washington Post about the David Letterman/Sarah Palin ‘feud’. If you don’t feel like reading the entire article, here’s what was attributed to me:

Letterman shouldn’t apologize, if only to preserve the comedian’s prerogative to satirize the powerful and to be offensive on occasion, says Erin Jackson, a rising local stand-up comic. “People read things into jokes that you never meant and never intended,” she says. “If [Letterman] got into a cycle of apologizing for a joke or comment, you don’t know where it would stop, or how far back you’d have to go to satisfy everyone. I don’t think he can be who he is if he started doing that.”

Adds Jackson: “When you give it to everyone equally, as Letterman does, as all the late-night people do, you kind of have to take it. It’s like demanding an apology from the National Enquirer — it’s better to just get over it.”

The writer made it clear to me that he didn’t want to examine the political angle of the story — he just wanted the opinion of a comedian on whether or not it was a good idea professionally for Letterman to offer an apology. I’ve offered quotes for articles before, but this weekend was the first time I’ve ever gotten negative e-mails about my comments. Sure I’ve gotten random, anonymous comments on YouTube, etc. But this was full-blown “I’m gonna give you a piece of my mind AND my first and last name and e-mail address.” You know, grown and sexy hate mail.Â The first message came at like 1 in the morning. I was out with friends and heard the Berry go off. I was crossing my fingers hard for an unexpected booty call …

Nope, just hate mail.

Continue reading →

Replacement players

So I was watching my daily hour of “The Fresh Prince of Bel Air” this morning and each of the two episodes they showed had a different “Aunt Viv.” Now I LOVED this show. I actually cried during the final episode. Yeah, I know… But I was never really comfortable with Daphne Reid replacing the uber fabulous Janet Hubert — who left the show over contract/salary issues. Don’t get me wrong — I like Daphne Reid, it’s just that in my opinion she didn’t ooze bougie-Black-fab quite like the first Aunt Viv.

And that got me to thinking about other shows I liked who swapped out actors in the same role. And I thought about Lionel Jefferson from “The Jeffersons” and “All in the Family.” If like myself, you are a student of these shows (pats self of back ;) you’ll remember that the first Lionel left and was replaced by the second Lionel, and then returned a few seasons later. Crazy. I was always partial to the middle Lionel. I thought he was handsome ;) My mom went to high school with one of them, but I can never remember which one…

And how could I do a post like this without mentioning the two Becky’s on “Roseanne.” Becky 1.0 left the show to go to college — which of course you can’t hate on. But as much as I loved her on Scrubs, I never liked Sarah Chalke as Becky 2.0. Maybe it’s because I really loved that show and I’m averse to change. Maybe it’s because the second Becky was a little too pretty and polished for the Connor family… Who can say for sure? But I never quite bought it.

There’s really no point to this post other than to say that if you’re having contract disputes or actors have to leave your show because of personal issues, instead of replacing them, you should do what they did on “Family Matters” and write that character out of the script with no explanation.

Remember Judy Winslow?

When she left the show, they didn’t replace her. They didn’t create a storyline to explain why she vanished. They just acted like she never existed and made the rest of America wonder, “Are we crazy, or wasn’t there another kid on this show?” That’s the way you do it, Hollywood. Like when a character got whacked on “The Sopranos”…That’s just the end of that. Sure that dismissal probably had a lot to do with her turning to a career in adult films, but what are you gonna do?

I was going to write a conclusion sentence or two to this entry, but I’m drained and I’m sleepy so I’m just gonna take a nap instead. Because I can.

Artomatic ’09

Me at Artomatic. Look at all the cool exhibits! Not sure cameras were allowed... Ooopsies!

If you live in the DC area and you haven’t been to Artomatic yet… forgive yourself. And then go! It’s at 55 M Street. Right at the Navy Yard Stop. It runs through July 6, but you should go early and often. No excuses. It’s free. And also there’s lot of awesome. 9 floors worth.

There’s visual art and performing arts, tattoos even… I went last Saturday because I was performing during the 9pm comedy block and I had a blast. I was running to another show so I didn’t have time to see much of the other artwork but I’m going back for sure. Maybe next time I’ll check to see if there’s a Nats game first (duh) or take the train. Actually I think I’ll be performing again on Friday nite. Hope to see you there.

Visit the Artomatic website for more info if you need it.

From the Blog to the Stage – “Zoolander” Walkoff

So, I’ve been trying to come up with a few new bits on our president and first lady to perform for my TBS TV taping in a few weeks. I figure I’m from DC and the show tapes in Chicago… I feel like it’s a no brainer. I posted the status below a few days ago on Facebook and there seemed to be a consensus that the idea had potential — even my buddy, the hilarious Keith Albertstadt commented on it!Â I tried out a very similar bit onstage the last two nites and it hit big, so I’m gonna keep tweaking it. No “Blog to the Stage” video to post yet, but if all goes well, it’ll be included in the final edit of the show. I don’t know why I never thought to use Facebook to write jokes before… I mean, duh… what are “friends” for? ;) Tee hee ;) Wish me luck!

New furniture?…

OK so I went to Dick’s Sporting Goods the other day to buy a few sets of free weights.

Those who knew me in my former life know that I used to be ridiculously obsessed with weight lifting and strength training. I squatted nearly 500 lbs. I could bench 235… My strength coach was actually “Mr. New Jersey” — or at least Mr. Rutgers — who can remember the specifics? ;) I spent entire summers with him in the gym. I’ll try and dig up some old photos and scan them. Old school friends, back me up! Y’all remember Rich Refi! ;)

I haven’t really done any weight training so far in GF’09 — mainly because I don’t have access to (or money to join) a gym. But I decided not to let that stop me. I figured at least with a few sets of free weights I could at least do some flies, curls, shoulder press, etc.

Sooooo… here we are.

I’m gonna do my best to get on a regular schedule and not let them just sit in the corner. It’s been about 5 years since I did any weight training at all. So I anticipate lots of pain, but it’ll be worth it. Plus, I’ll be better equipped to handle MSBLKNASTY if she ever decides to come for me ;) Tee hee ;)

Innnnnn-appropriate… That’s what you are

I was just reading about Kimora Lee’s new baby on a message board where someone had the user name “MSBLKNASTY1”… Which means not only that “MSBLKNASTY” was already taken (you know what they say about ‘great minds’), but that this person was so determined to have that user name that when it came up as unavailable she proceeded to enter additional characters until she got a hit… as if it were her real name. Oh i can’t have ErinJackson? OK, how bout Erinjackson1.

So many questions. I hope she doesn’t find me and wanna fight.