Music & lyrics

“We gotta hold on to what we got. Doesn’t make a difference if we’re naked or not.”

When I was a kid, that’s what I thought Bon Jovi was saying in Livin on a Prayer. I heard it this morning on my iPod and I started cracking up, remembering the day–many, many years after the song came out–that one of my friends called me out on my rendition. Sure the lyrics I was singing didn’t make sense but like they say on Def Jam, I just thought “these white folks is crazy.”

Any of y’all have any crazy song lyric misinterpretations, comment and let me know. It always makes me feel better to hear what someone else got wrong. Well yeah, i thought he said “naked or not” but at least I knew…

Go head, leave a message.

Damn, Reh Dogg


OK, please don’t read any further until you’ve actually watched the video.

Exhale… OK so if you’re not familiar with Reh Dogg, I’m going to have to beg you to get familiar. Most of you know of my love for Samwell (click here and here), and I will never cheat on him… but Reh Dogg is an internet phenom that cannot be ignored. He barely speaks English but he is for real clowning Tammie Starr — whoever the hell she is. Did you catch the photo cut out of her face floating across the screen?… From what I can ascertain she’s a bitch and whore. And she apparently slept with him, got pregnant and had twins and says they’re his, but he doesn’t believe her. Now, I don’t know who this woman is, and she may very well be a bitch and a whore, but I find it hard to believe that she or any other woman would falsely claim Reh Dogg was the father of her children. But you know what they say–one woman’s garbage…

The thing is, his ‘lyrics’ are so brutal. I swear he’s like the corny, nerdy kid everyone underestimated when they were playing the dozens in grade school, and then he started ripping on you, got way too personal and made you cry. “That’s why your daddy left your crippled ass mama with 6 kids and y’all on welfare and…”

Oh wait, I’ve said too much…

Anyway Reh Dogg has a bunch of other ‘songs’ on youtube so check him out. I need to hear Tammie Starr’s rebuttal track. Now. Oh gosh, just look at this dude. I’m out.

It’s not delivery, it’s…

No not DiGiorno.

So yes, I live in Southeast D.C. Do I live in the worst neighborhood? No. On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being: DUCK NINJA!), I’d rate the relative sheist of mine and the surrounding blocks a 6.

So why did the delivery guy at the Chinese spot tonite say that he’d deliver my food, but I had to walk to the end of the block to pick it up? That doesn’t sound like delivery at all, especially when you consider that the damn carry out is only like three blocks away. I’m already in my jammies and my hair is wet, or else normally I’d walk and get it myself. I told him I wouldn’t be walking to the corner and he says, “Why you don’t just pick up? You lazy.”

WORD?

Note to Danny’s Chinese Food and Sub Shop Owner because he/she is a regular reader: 1) You can’t advertise delivery and then tell people they’re lazy when they ask for their dinner to be delivered. On their menu it ‘clearly’ — and i use this word hesitantly — says “WE DELIVERY – MENIMUM 10 DOLLAR FOOD”. (hahaha :)

2) You chose to set up your business in the hood. So if safety is the reason your driver doesn’t want to deliver in the neighborhood, then you need to find someone who will.

I was telling my friend Dawan who was over for some Chinese yumminess a few months back that I’ve had several talks with the delivery guy on the occasions when I didn’t go pick up my food about how he refuses to look me in the eye. I hesitate to even use this cliche, but ‘I was raised’ to spend my money only with people who show me respect. Delivery dude doesn’t even say hello to me when he comes, and he takes my money and gives me change all without looking at me. I probably would have quit this carry out months ago if it weren’t so amazingly delicious. But here’s the thing, when I asked him why he won’t make eye contact with me, he tells me that he was robbed twice when delivering food and that the people who did it told him not to look at him — to forget their faces — and scared him from reporting the incident to the police.

Now even in the midst of all my stomach-growling pulpitting, I have to admit I felt bad for him then. BUT I have lost all sympathy now that he called me lazy. Anywayz, let me go and try and find something to put in my tummy. Latah.