I’m in Temecula, California right now working at The Comedy Club at Pechanga with my good buddy Vince Morris and the very funny Keith Bender. I hadn’t worked with Vince in over a year so we had a ball, plus we had great shows all week! The club was in a casino and I was super proud of myself for pretending that wasn’t the case. I’m a sucker for roulette and dollar slots. I’ve been doing a lot more material lately on my tragic relationship history and it’s been going over pretty well. The stuff about my mom pressuring me to have kids seems to resonate with a lot of folks — so much so that after our last show of the week, a woman came up to me to talk to me about my biological clock:
LADY: You need to hurry up and have a baby.
MY EYES: You need to hurry up and pay for this t-shirt.
Then she told me how old she was when she had her kid, and that I still had a couple years… EXHALE. I guess it’s nice that people identify with the act and feel comfortable enough with me after a show to come up and talk about my life. But I had just finished talking about how badly I hate it when my mom gets on me about the babies, so why would this woman I didn’t know think I wanted to hear it from her? Sheesh, I sure hope I have more than a couple years left, because at this point I have no idea where a baby would fit.
Maybe in my carry-on?