California, casinos and biological clocks

photo by Joey Fink

I’m in Temecula, California right now working at The Comedy Club at Pechanga with my good buddy Vince Morris and the very funny Keith Bender. I hadn’t worked with Vince in over a year so we had a ball, plus we had great shows all week! The club was in a casino and I was super proud of myself for pretending that wasn’t the case. I’m a sucker for roulette and dollar slots. I’ve been doing a lot more material lately on my tragic relationship history and it’s been going over pretty well. The stuff about my mom pressuring me to have kids seems to resonate with a lot of folks — so much so that after our last show of the week, a woman came up to me to talk to me about my biological clock:

LADY: You need to hurry up and have a baby.
MY EYES: You need to hurry up and pay for this t-shirt.

Then she told me how old she was when she had her kid, and that I still had a couple years… EXHALE. I guess it’s nice that people identify with the act and feel comfortable enough with me after a show to come up and talk about my life. But I had just finished talking about how badly I hate it when my mom gets on me about the babies, so why would this woman I didn’t know think I wanted to hear it from her? Sheesh, I sure hope I have more than a couple years left, because at this point I have no idea where a baby would fit.

Maybe in my carry-on?