Big Sky

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I just got back from a road trip that took me out to Montana and Wyoming for some college shows. Look at this photo! They don’t call Montana “Big Sky Country” for nothing!

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It was my first time in Wyoming; I memorialized it with this photo. I’ve worked in 45 states now; all I’ve got left are Hawaii, New Mexico, the Dakotas and Utah. I’ve had several layovers in SLC airport, but layovers don’t count. I was in Montana last fall for a show with my favorite, Wendy Leibman, but were were in and out in the dark of night so I didn’t get to see how beautiful it was out there. I flew into Billings on Wednesday and then made the 2-hour drive to Sheridan Wyoming for my show that evening. On my way, I passed a highway sign for Little Bighorn Battlefield. I had about 6 hours until my show, so hell yeah for Custer’s Last Stand.

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I got there about 30 minutes before they stopped  letting people into the park so I didn’t even have to pay the $20 drive-through fee. There was a museum, several monuments, and an audio tour you could hear on your cell phone. I went through as much as I could before the rangers started pulling people out of the park. Such a cool bit of history. I love an adventure!

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I put almost 800 miles on my rental car in the two days I was out there; Alamo Rent-A-Car was like “ummmm, never again.” It’d have been even more than that if the weather at Yellowstone hadn’t been so crummy. I probably added an extra 3 hours to my drive time by pulling over to take so many photos. But it was worth it. And it was easy driving. Those wide open highways are a joy to drive on, and with a speed limit of 80mph, my lead foot was in heaven. I often feel like I drive for a living and comedy is what I get to do when I get off. But I really do love seeing America. I have so many stories from almost every state. I would love to have a Hawaii story, next.

If you’re there, God, it’s me, EJ…

Memories

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I’m back in the DC Metro area (McLean, VA to be exact) to do a corporate event tomorrow afternoon. And as I was headed towards my hotel, I realized I was driving right past the old Best Western Westpark Hotel building, which used to house Wiseacres Comedy Club. I don’t know how long it’s been empty; I haven’t been out this way in at least 6-7 years. But when I first started out in comedy, I was there every single Wednesday nite. Man. The open mics in that dark, dingy room are where I met some of my very favorite people. I learned how to write and workshop a joke there, learned how to be a good citizen of the comedy community. I was grateful for my 5 minutes on stage in that room, even when I went up 20th. And I never wanted to go home after those shows. Dinner and drinks after the mic? Absolutely. Work tomorrow? Who cares? That little dungeon will hold a place in my heart forever.

So much debauchery

So much debauchery went down in here

Rob, Randy, Ryan, Jett, Diesel, Herbie, Dawan, Tim, Chris, Jimmy… I miss those days.

Those were great days.

Let’s Go Knicks

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Last night, I went to the Knicks/Wizards game at The Garden with my boy T.O.N.Y. He’s a Knicks superfan even though he lives in DC and has season tickets to the Wizards. It was my first time at a game in the Garden since middle school and the first game since Derek Fisher’s firing, so it felt kinda like Christmas. My teams are 2-for-2 on firing crappy coaches this year and I’m all about it. During one of the commercial breaks the people with the t-shirt cannons came out and started shooting them into the stands and people in the crowd lost their s***. I’m always amazed by how crazed people become over the high-velocity propulsion of shitty, free t-shirts towards their faces. The video below is me saying as much.

Not 20 minutes later, as if on cue, I caught a t-shirt with my jaw. I secured it with my right hand as it hit me so it didn’t go tumbling into the next row… It was like the David Tyree helmet catch and OBJ’s one-handed grab had an awesome catch baby. I don’t think that last sentence makes any sense, but I’m not deleting it. I’m sure that at some point in my life I’ve laughed harder, and for longer; I just can’t remember when. #TITF But not really.

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I joked with T.O.N.Y. about how mad I would be—I would have demanded to see someone in management—if I got smacked in the face and wound up with a small or medium t-shirt. But, alas, it was an XL. They didn’t want it with Hov.

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Russell Wilson and Ciara’s weave (pictured above) were at the game, They were sitting down on the floor next to Lala Anthony. I know Lala and Ciara are good friends because I may or may not really like her reality show, but I was having a hard time picturing Melo and Russ hanging out. They just don’t seem like they’d have a lot in common besides the professional athlete thing. I would love to be a fly on the wall at one of their double dates.

But I digress.

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The Knicks have been on a terrible losing streak and though they came close, they did not break it last nite. They missed a 3 at the buzzer that would have sent the game into OT. But it was not meant to be. I’m looking forward to the team improving under new/old coach Kurt Rambis and hopefully snagging a higher profile coach in the offseason. We’re not a good team, but we’re not terrible either. And it’s been a long time since I felt that way. Anyway, I need to be packing a bag right now. The road is calling.