Get thee behind me and stayeth there

In a long airport security line and they open up another lane. The lady behind me grabs her son’s hand and runs to get in front of me.

ME: You have to be kidding. You were kidding, right?

LADY: Oh… yeah… you can go ahead of us.

ME: (big eyes)

As I often do when people tick me off, I wrote a collection of haiku about it. Wanna read it, here it go:

Get thee behind me
Jesus said that to Peter
Stay thine ass there too

Took you two minutes
To pull off your cowboy boots
And five dudes passed you

Haha serves you right
Musta thought I was a punk
I’m the opposite

Allergies are expensive and the feeling is mutual

Last nite was the premiere of my episode of “Wanda Sykes Presents Herlarious.” I know there was playoff football happening plus a ton of other stuff so in case you missed it, here’s part of my set — a bit about the allergy attacks I was having all summer. There really has to be a cheaper way to do allergy testing.

Thanks to all of you who had such nice things to say about my set. I was super nervous running the lead-off leg for a Judy Gold/Sheryl Underwood/Wanda Sykes relay, but I’m pretty happy with the end result. AND THEN THIS HAPPENED…

wanda tweet copy

And it obviously made my day/week/year (I know I skipped month). The feeling is soooo mutual! I’m so grateful Page and Wanda invited me to be part of their show. It was really one of the best times I’ve had doing this job! If you didn’t catch it, I’m sure it’ll be repeated. Or you can just stop by my crib and watch it on the DVR. Either way.

It’s an honor just to be nominated


As most of you know, I perform a ton of college shows each year. They’re my bread and butter and I hope they don’t find out I’m an old lady. Shhhh… Each year the university student programmers and advisers nominate their favorite performers of the year for awards through the publication of the National Association for Campus Activities (NACA), Campus Activities Magazine. And this year I was nominated “Best Female Entertainer!” Yaaay! Any college student or adviser whose campus I visited or I met at a NACA conference is eligible to vote (you have to have a verifiable .edu e-mail address). I’m up against some stiff competition so I’m getting started early. If I’ve been to your school and you enjoyed it, I hope you’ll vote for me here:

Thanks a bunch and wish me luck! It IS an honor to be nominated, but winning is cool too.


Hey guys! Check me out this Saturday, January 11 on OWN’s “Wanda Sykes Presents Herlarious.” We shot at Harpo in the studio where the Oprah Winfrey Show took place, plus Sheryl Underwood and Judy Gold are also on this episode. WHAT A BLAST!!! I was super nervous with those ladies, plus Wanda, watching me backstage. Hope I don’t look as nervous as I felt. Either way it was huge fun! I hope you’ll tune in.