This week could quite possibly be the best week I’ve ever had in my life… No exaggeration. And I mean better than the week I ditched the coke bottles and got contacts, better than the week my mom let me cut the Jheri Curl out, better than the week I tasted Carrie Ivey’s banana pudding for the first time… Why, you ask? Well, that’s my business not yours. Stop being so nosey.
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ร‚ย But here’s one awesomely hilarious thing I witnessed this week… I went to a really fancy dinner party — a “gala” even. And there was a gentleman giving a speech at the podium in the center of the room. And when he was done several people decided that he deserved a standing ovation… and boy do I LOVE standing ovations! Watching people decide whether or not they’re going to participate in the ovation is like one of my most favorite things in this world. Cause everyone’s thought process is exactly the same as the ovation is developing. A few people stand up and you think “Should I?… Nah, they’ll be done in a second. If I get up and they all sit right down, I’ll have stood up for nothing… Wait looks like this thing is really taking off… I don’t want to be the only one not standing…” Then inevitably you’ll stand up and everyone will be sitting back down… Or what’s even funnier is when its time to stop clapping. You start looking around at everyone when you think it should be about over and then you start to sit down — you bend your knees… but then nope, its not over… We’re still clapping. Lather, rinse repeat… I witnessed a standing ovation that lasted about 30 seconds longer than it needed to because no one was bold enough to sit the hell down. That’s a long time. Hilarious.
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ร‚ย But it got even better because then some other people were recognized, but the audience wasn’t nearly as enthusiastic about those people, or maybe they were just burned out from the first ovation, so there was kind of a half-assed standing o, for the next few people, which in my opinion is worse than no standing o at all… I don’t know if any of y’all are following me. This might need to be filed into the “you had to be there” category, but man, was it funny to me…

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