Good Ass Magnets

This morning while I was tacking up some Christmas photos of my friends’ kids, I realized that I had three save-the-date magnets on my refrigerator from couples that are no longer married. (Stop looking so close — I removed the magnets I’m talking about. Sheesh, I’m not that big an a–hole.) Such a shame. I’ve been doing a joke lately about not wanting to take the tags off new dresses unless it’s for a worthwhile event. Watch below:

It’s only a joke… But I actually felt kinda bad about the bit after this morning’s discovery… And I considered just trashing the magnets because they conjure bad memories and probably carry bad energy — but I didn’t. Wanna know why? Because they are some good ass magnets. Strong magnets. Not so much for the marriages…

But I digress.

I don’t think I’ve ever bought a magnet in my life. And I damn sure ain’t ’bout to pick today to start running buying them. I feel so sorry for all involved. And I’ll try my best to remember to take down your magnets the next time any of you come to visit.

Amen.

Basketball, Burgers & Bammas

I went to a Wizards game a few weeks ago and saw one of the grossest things I’ve ever seen. Admittedly, I’m grossed out pretty easily, but I think some of y’all will agree with me. And if that glowing promo didn’t do it for you — watch for my involuntary use of the word ‘lunchin.’ In my 14 years living in DC I’ve managed to keep that word out of my vocabulary. Well, it seeped in somehow, and now I’m worried that it’s here to stay… Also the wild turkeys from a few blogs back make an appearance. And my friend Alicia — who is going to kill me for this video since the only two clips of her in it are of her screaming at the top of her lungs… I think maybe I’m just not gonna tell her about it.

Don’t you tell her either.

He who cometh in first-eth…

I recently weighed in on the following Facebook post:

It was clear to me that the poster shared my opinion on this issue and I left a comment that sparked quite the discussion. Check out the clip below and I’ll see you on the other side:

Now, of course I took a bit of creative license there. But basically, this bit sums up my point of view on the subject. I don’t have any children yet. But I played sports all thru school and coached youth sports for several years and I believe that the current prevailing attitudes in many youth sports leagues (both teams get trophys/everyone’s a winner) do a disservice to young athletes. In my opinion, team sports should first and foremost be fun for kids. But beyond that, athletics should teach them how to function within the team dynamic, develop leadership skills, celebrate victories and learn to work through and rebound from defeat.

Well, several people on the thread cheered me on, while a couple really wanted to… ahem… let me know how they felt about how I felt. One said that the “winning is everything” attitude is what causes some people to shoot steroids and do unhealthy things to get ahead, and that anyone who subscribed to that belief shouldn’t work near organized youth sports… I agree of course that extreme pressure to win can be detrimental to athletes — especially young ones. But there’s a difference between “winning is everything” and “losing exists.” By no means do I believe that kids should be punished or made to feel badly for losing in athletic competition. But I also think we do them a disservice when we have competitions where scores aren’t kept and every team receives a trophy. Whatever… shoot me.

I think parents and coaches should be responsible for making sure that kids don’t equate their athletic performance with their self-worth. But I also think children need to be taught that in life, you’re not always rewarded for just showing up. One poster said that going home with a smaller trophy motivates kids to want the larger one next time. And maybe that’s true. But it used to be that going home with no trophy served the same purpose. Perhaps it’s a matter of at what age it’s appropriate to begin imparting this philosophy. I dunno. But it’s not something I’m likely to change my opinion on.

What do you guys think?

I hope you don’t make it to the future / T-shirt Promo — Take 2

The video above is the bit that the t-shirts I sell after my shows are based on. Some people hate them and think they’re mean. But most people think they’re awesome — especially teachers. It AMAZES me how many teachers come up to me to tell me they’re teachers before they purchase one (or more). They always tell me they can’t wait til the weekend to wear it. I always imagine them running into their students and/or their parents at the grocery store.

It makes me happy.

Either way I know there are a lot of folks out there who share my sentiment. Maybe they wouldn’t say it so directly or in public, but I see y’all out there. It’s in the eyes. I know my Dad would/will die when he sees this clip (LANGUAGE!!!) Ha ha. But there’s no other way to tell that second story.

And it’s a story that must be told.

If you’re offended by this, I’m sorry you have no sense of humor. But if you’re not offended and want your own shirt, check out the merchandise page on my site and cop yourself one. It will make you happy too.